“What Has Technology Done To Us?

Have you ever had that moment when the message tone on your phone goes off and you wonder, “How am I going to take the phone out of my toddler’s hand?” Many parents are asking that question multiple times throughout the day. We now live in a society where technology allows us to have everything at our fingertips. Instead of going out to buy books to read or hundreds of toys to play with, something so simple as an iPhone or iPad can bring all of those things to the living room, the car, and even the doctor’s office. Everything is available via portable device.  IPhones and other various smart phones come equipped with apps ranging from television shows, to pictures, interactive activities, and sound games. It seems more logical to have children learn via a device, though, while all of these advances are making our lives more accessible, what is the impact on kids who know them as the only available source of entertainment?

          The more helpful technology becomes to us, the more addicted the next generation will become. Every time a new phone, tablet, or iPad is released, we take away one more intrapersonal moment. A key factor in healthy childhood development is social interaction. If a child is regularly attached to a device, they limit the time they spend interacting with others and learning through imitation. While these may seem like minor details at the toddler stage, as time marches on, will the next generation understand the importance of hardback books, paper magazines, or talking verbally?

            Medically, apparently these behaviors can lead to issues down the line. Every adult who grew up with a T.V. was told that if they sit too close to the television, they will ruin their eyes. Same is true of phones and tablets. With the screens usually no further than one foot away from the eye, technology can be damaging to the youthful eye. I wonder if the fact that more children than ever are wearing glasses is a result. The time children spend indoors on different technological devices, when they could be outside running, jumping, climbing, and doing something better for their health is another consideration. Inactive children possess a higher risk of becoming obese than children who are consistently physically active.

            There is no doubt why children are addicted to technology. It’s because, as adults, we are. Technology flew in on its broom and gave us time. Instead of typing a paper, we can now speak into a device and our words appear on the screen, allowing us to multitask. The age of who gets a gift of an iPad, tablet, or laptop has become younger and younger. While there are pros and cons, think about the balance. For every hour a child stays mesmerized on their device, that’s less outdoor play they may enjoy or even one more friend they never get the opportunity to make at the park that day. 

Idea From:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/11/07/kids-and-phones-smartphones-child_n_2079105.html?utm_hp_ref=parents&ir=Parents

Who Speaks? Autism Speaks.

Just as their young child is beginning to walk and function by themselves, one of the most trying experiences for a parent is to be told is that their child may be on the autism spectrum.  Unfortunately, more parents are hearing those harsh words.  One in every 88 children in the US is diagnosed as being on the spectrum for autism. What does being on the spectrum mean? Autism Speaks defines it as, “having exceptional abilities in visual skills, music and academic skills. About 40 percent have intellectual disability (IQ less than 70), and many have normal to above average intelligence. Indeed, many persons on the spectrum take deserved pride in their distinctive abilities and “atypical” ways of viewing the world. Others with autism have significant disability and are unable to live independently. About 25 percent of individuals with ASD are nonverbal but can learn to communicate using other means.”

Autism affects more children in the US than Diabetes, AIDS, Cancer, Cerebral Palsy, Cystic Fibrosis, Muscular Dystrophy, and Down Syndrome combined.

            Autism can be diagnosed as early as 18-24 months. Once a child is diagnosed, many parents must realize that their child may have to go to extreme measures to live a somewhat normal life compared to other children. This is modeled in a new book by autistic teen, Trevor Pacelli, titled Growing Up Autistic: 100 Lessons To Understand How Autistic People See Life. In his book, Pacelli explains what it is like growing up autistic, being diagnosed at 5 years old, and how people can better understand what goes on inside the mind of a person on the spectrum. Within the book, Pacelli shares 10 things people should know about autistic children and teens and how they think: 

1.      They get either A’s or F’s
2.      Nobody on earth thinks like them.
3.      Time alone vs. time with others
4.      Some actually prefer to be alone
5.      Balance solo activities with parental interaction
6.      They also want to go out
7.      They need to vent their problems
8.      Getting out of the home helps with social skills
9.      Everyone needs to be socially active
10.  Some can have mood swings

While many parents and caregivers may not understand how the autistic brain functions, the fact that autism affects hundreds of thousands of children in this country is reason enough why we need to be educated. Understanding how this abnormal brain functions, is the first step in finding a cure so that it can function normally. Listen to how autism speaks.

http://www.autismspeaks.org/what-autism/faq

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/10/23/growing-up-autistic-teen-_n_2005778.html?utm_hp_ref=parents&ir=Parents

Is 5 Years Old Too Young For An Addiction?

Most working adults will tell you that if they start their day without coffee, it will inevitably be tiresome, slow, and less productive as a morning with Folgers in their cup. Now, what if someone told you that a five year old was having that same reaction? Could someone that young be addicted to caffeine? Recent studies are showing that children are becoming addicted to caffeine as young as five, not because of coffee, but because of everything that comes cold and thirst quenching.  And, the frequency in which they consume these beverages adds to the problem.  Here are just a few things children are drinking that have their caffeine adrenalin soaring through their little young bodies:

• ·         Arizona Green Tea Energy ® 200 mg equivalent to 4 Cokes
• ·         Orange Soda ® Filled with acid & one 12 ounce contains 41 mg of caffeine
• ·         Mountain Dew ® Has 55 mg of caffeine
• ·         Pepsi ® Contains 38 mg of caffeine/ 54 mg for Pepsi ONE

With the average suggested caffeine intake at fewer than 200 mg per day, most people surpass this number based on the size of their cup. If you think that switching your soda with a diet version will make it better, THINK AGAIN! When companies remove sugar, they add more substitute sweeteners, therefore, enhancing the amount of caffeine. With sodas, sports drinks, teas, and energy boosters present in many homes across America, children have more accessibility to this “drug” than ever before (if it can cause an addiction, yes, it is a drug).

            Are you now wondering what the caffeine is really doing to these young bodies? Caffeine is a stimulant. It is used to boost endorphins within the body for a short amount of time by speeding up the heart rate and releasing energy. The problem with caffeine is that, when the heart rate is increased and then drops, it weakens the heart. Just think, a child’s heart is far less developed than that of an adult; therefore, their heart is being damaged before it reaches its full potential. Enhanced heart rates can lead to heart attack or stroke. When the body is on caffeine, it makes it harder to sleep. In children, since their body does not absorb caffeine as quickly as an adult, it stays in their system longer and makes it harder for them to go to sleep, disrupting their sleep pattern.

            In recent news, a Maryland family has filed a lawsuit against Monster, an energy drink company, after their 14 year old daughter drank two cans in a 24hr period and went into cardiac arrest. This is just one of five cases being investigated throughout the country in which young people have suffered extreme heart conditions after drinking these energy boosters.

            With stories such as these in the news, parents are pushing for energy drinks and soft drink companies to place disclaimers on their products, warning of caffeine amounts and possible dangers. Should companies place a disclaimer on these products, or should parents take away the caffeinated drinks and hand over a bottle of water? What is your child having with their dinner tonight?

http://health.usnews.com/health-news/family-health/childrens-health/articles/2010/12/16/kids-are-getting-amped-on-caffeine-even-at-age-5

Is It Worth Your Life

As the Public Service Announcement broadcasted, millions of viewers watched a grieving sister who held up a sign saying, “R U...” That was the last text message she sent to her younger sister, Ashley.  Instead of waiting until she arrived at her destination safely, Ashley made a choice to read the incoming message while driving. At the “R U…”, Ashley’s car ran off the road.  She was killed upon impact.

Tragedies, such as Ashley’s, prompted AT&T to launch a national Public Service Announcement (PSA) campaign titled, It Can Wait as a pledge to save lives.  Found on online, or posted on social networking pages, this oath can be taken as a commitment  not to text, talk or focus on the phone while driving.

According to AT&T, people who text while driving, are 23 times more likely to be involved in, or cause a crash.  Michael Headen, a business management major at Holy Family University, felt the effects of texting while driving.  He was run off the road by a young driver on the phone who ran through a red light.  “I refuse to text and drive because I know that no text message or phone call is worth my life. Knowing that I could injure myself, or end someone else’s life, just because of a message, would make it hard for me to look at myself in the mirror,” said Headen, who advocates against texting while driving.  “Summer months, due to the absence of school days and newly vacationing families, are the most dangerous months of the year,” a quote stated on the AT&T website. Some states have now banned texting and talking while driving with laws.  In NJ the laws fall under the same category as drunk driving.

According to the Governors Highway Safety Administration, 10 states banned talking while driving, and 39 states banned texting while driving.  Neglecting these laws will result in a fine. “Although I know it’s wrong, we are so consumed with our everyday life that we feel as if we don’t access to our cell phones while driving, we’re missing something,” said Immaculata University senior Allison Zbrowski. Zbrowski admitted that, while the possibility of an accident does scare her, putting down the phone is difficult because cell phones serve multiple functions.

Cell phone companies have made putting the phone down an oxymoron.  Phones are now "smart" and used not only for communicating but also to find a direction to a destination or to get the latest sports scores or to play a game with a friend 1000 miles away.  AT&T launched an experiment using simulated texting drivers.  Drivers were asked to respond to a flashing light while texting.  A majority of the participants never noticed the flashing light because they were consumed by texting.  “When I text and drive, I notice what’s right in front of me. Anything else is usually out of my view,” said Brittney Wilson, a senior psychology student from Indiana University of Pennsylvania.  Texting and driving is familiar to Wilson, who admitted she caused a fender bender while on her phone a year ago.

“In 2010, texting while driving increased 50 percent in one year, and two out of 10 drivers say they've sent text messages or emails while behind the wheel, despite a rush by states to ban the practice,” noted in a statement released by AT&T at the beginning of their campaign.  By the end of 2012, AT&T will have been to more than 200 cities convincing drivers, especially young drivers, It Can Wait.  AT&T’s campaign is determined to reach everyone in their outreach.  Aside from touring, they have released multiple PSA showing the effects of texting while driving. All of these tragedies could have been prevented by doing one thing.  Take the pledge and put the phone down. IT CAN WAIT!
Written by Porsha Haynes, Senior, Holy Family University

The Voice

A bully is generally defined as a person who is habitually cruel to others who are weaker.  Unfortunately, kids of all ages are exposed to this type of behavior.  Bullying can start as the most simple of actions, from a sting in the lunch room or playground that can paint a child as a weaker person.   However, it can become as serious as continued physical and emotional abuse.  There is no limit to the damage a bully can cause another child.  In this day of technology, there can be no reprieve from a bully, and a child can be reached on the bus, school ground and even in the comfort of their own home.  Where and when does it end? 

We offer this one approach to try and end it before it before it can even begin.  As  parents and caregivers, we cannot control the actions of other children.  What we can do, is teach our children to be strong and listen to the voice inside of them.  To speak up when they know something is not right, takes the weaker person out the definition.  As parents and caregivers , we know how frightening it can be to send children out into the world and let them stand on their own two feet.  It is difficult in the best of situations, let alone when we know there is someone being unkind.  However, no matter the circumstances, we still need to teach our children to be confident on their own, because frightening or not, we cannot be there every step of the way.  One of the few things worse than knowing someone is being mean to a child you love, is knowing they have no idea how to defend themselves, or worse yet, thinking he/she is not worth defending. The best way  to stand up for children is to teach them how and, and why to stand up for themselves.

What is an inner voice?  Well, to use the words of children's author Shel Silverstein...

“The Voice

There is a voice inside of you

That whispers all day long,

"I feel this is right for me,

I know that this is wrong."

No teacher, preacher, parent, friend

Or wise man can decide

What's right for you--just listen to

The voice that speaks inside.”

Here are three suggestions from TPNN for parents and caregivers to help teach children to hear and listen to their inner voice:

1. Communicate with your children.  Talk with your child about what happens during their days at school. Ask your children about bullying? Opening up the conversation with your child will let them know you are supportive and that what they have to say is important. 
2. Lead by example.  Check behavior at home and demonstrate respect for all people.  Children will follow the behavior patterns of parents and caregivers, and will show and demand the same respect they see at home.
3. Teach your child compassion, caring and confidence.  And if or when the time comes, you will support them.  Teach your child to come to you when they need help.

Has your family, or someone you know been impacted by a bully?  Share your story here and maybe help another family or child overcome their battle.

The Summer Slide

Can you believe summer is almost done? School will be here sooner than we know it because once again the summer has gone way too fast!  As we prepare our little ones to head back to the classroom in September, have you found that certain skills that were mastered by your children in June have begun to deteriorate? In other words, has the “summer slide” has found its way into your house?

The “summer slide” is described as the loss in learning that occurs when students are not engaged in scholastic, academically enriching activities for a prolonged period.  By the end of summer vacation, the average student loses approximately a month’s worth of learning acquired from the previous year.  And it doesn’t end there, as studies have shown the impact is cumulative. A 2007 Johns Hopkins University study found that by ninth grade, about two-thirds of the achievement gap in reading, for example, can be attributed to summer learning loss that took place in the first five years of schooling.

Nationally, there are approaches being discussed to prevent learning loss over the summer months.  However, as parents and caregivers what can we do here and now to help our children?  Today The Philadelphia Nanny Network wanted to share some ideas to help spark some creativity as we get ready for Back to School. Here are just a few ideas to get the creative juices flowing and help make summer fun also equal summer learning.  There are still precious few summer days left, here are some ideas that both parents and nannies can work on together to make the most of them:

1.       Build a family game – game building is a very creative approach to science and math.  This is a great way to develop problem-solving skills while allowing children to be innovative.  Nannies can help the children work on a plan for the game, research and get supplies.  The children and nanny can build the game together.  After nanny hours, parents and children can play the game together, and the children get to “teach” the parents how to play.

2.       Find a reading program at the local library or bookstore that can fit into the children and nanny’s daily schedule.  Visit http://www.readwritethink.org/parent-afterschool-resources/ for additional resources on summer reading that can be carried into the new school year.  Parents can ask the child about the “rose” (best) and “thorn” (worst) part of the trip and read a library book before bed.

3.       Do a project together as a family.  Summer is the perfect time to complete DIY projects around the house.  Assign each family member an age appropriate job to research and complete.  Nannies can help the children plan budgets (math), plan out measurements (math and science), colors (problem solving) and so much more.  Projects can be incorporated into a fun family project to be enjoyed throughout the year.  With parents, the children can complete the project.  Each new day, the children can give a status update to the nanny and show off the work that was done.

It takes a village, and these are just a few ways that parents and nannies can work together so that children are ready to hit the books when school starts.

Is your child ready for the upcoming school year?  If so, what did your family network do to keep the “summer slide” out of your home and in the back yard where it belongs?

Can Women Have It All?

These past few weeks, the internet has been abuzz discussing “the working mom”, as though it’s a new concept. And while the concept has existed for decades upon decades, the strong opinions surrounding the Mommy-Wars are as fresh as ever. Thanks to Anne-Marie Slaughter’s anything-but-brief article, entitled “Why Women Still Can’t Have It All”, feminist ideas are coming under fire and maternal guilt is on the rise. Slaughter argues that, as the title suggests, women cannot have both a successful career and a successful family life. It comes down to a choice: either your career or your family can flourish, but not both. She notes that many successful career women, now in their 50s and 60s, have had to sacrifice time with their children and spouses to push against the glass ceiling; while women in their 30s and twenty-somethings are hesitant to begin a professional career because they someday want a family and have already come to the realization that they will never be able to have both. Naturally, her opinions received some opposition including many response articles. One of which, written by Jacoba Urist for Forbes Magazine, unveils the very solution to creating a manageable work-life balance. A solution that The Philadelphia Nanny Network, Inc. has been long aware of-

A really good nanny.

Urist discusses a novel idea that maybe women CAN have it all, if they just spread “it all” throughout the day. Between 6p and 8a, a woman can be a mother and raise a loving and successful family. Then from 8a-6p, she can be a lawyer, a writer or whatever her professional calling may be. And she can do all this by finding a nanny that is the right fit, an extension of her family and someone she can trust to raise her children while she is in her other role. As Urist states, “The key to a stronger family unit isn’t trying to juggle parenting and being something else. It’s about letting go and trusting the person or people who raise and educate your kids while you’re not around— and believing that your bonds with your child are strong enough to withstand your workday.”

What makes a parent?

The nuclear family. Even the expression seems somewhat dated in 2012. These days many people believe a mom, a dad and 2.5 children isn’t necessarily required to create a happy and loving environment where children can thrive.

Now a days families come in all shapes and forms: single parents; two mom households; two dad households; single parents and another relative or grandparent. This list could go on and on but legally speaking, there is one restriction, a child may have only 2 legal parents. This legality then excludes many other kinds of families such as two parents and grandparents or additional relatives all raising a child together; same sex parents plus an additional biological parent; biological parents plus a surrogate or donor; blended families and more. Shouldn’t all of these individuals have legal rights when it comes to the children they are raising? California State Senator Mark Leno and legislation SB 1476 believe they absolutely should!

This new legislation, State Bill 1476, has been proposed by San Francisco Democrat Mark Leno. The bill has passed the senate in California and is now in assembly. It would allow three or more individuals to legally act as a child’s parents, in family structures where it would be applicable. The bill does not expand the definition of who can be a parent, just expands the number of those individuals beyond two.

As could be expected, the reaction to this legislation has been large and loud. But what has been somewhat surprising is that the logical backlash—concerned mainly with legislative and judiciary ripples this bill may cause—has greatly surpassed the social backlash. The Association of Certified Family Law Specialists note tax deductions, citizenship, probate, public assistance, school notifications and Social Security rights are all affected by legal status of parenthood. The group’s president, Diane Wasznicky, mentioned that changes in the aforementioned programs are only some of many unintended consequences they fear may arise. The California Protective Parents Association brings forth the additional concern that children may be forced to bounce between any number of multiple homes as a result of custody battles. However, Attorney Catherine Sakimura of the National Center for Lesbian Rights, an organization co-sponsoring SB 1476, notes that, under the bill, judges must consider child stability when awarding custody and visitation.

All things considered, the question that should fuel the decision in the assembly becomes what are the benefits of SB 1476? And do they outweigh any possible negative effects? What do you think? Will SB 1476 help to redefine family structures and bring custody issues into the modern ages; or will it confuse the already muddy topic of who has rights and responsibilities when it comes to raising a child in today’s society? Additionally, is it something necessary in society, certainly one can act as a parent and influencer in a child’s life without documentation that they have taken on such a role. Is this issue important in promoting acceptance of the growing number of family types? Regardless of the outcome of SB 1476, we all can be certain that it takes a village to raise a child and the child’s influencers and caregivers often include parents, grandparents, other relatives, close friends, teachers, coaches and of course, nannies!

The Kid-Friendly Facebook—Can it exist?

With many (approximately 7.5 million) children under the age of 13 already creating Facebook accounts, by falsifying their age, perhaps it seems remiss of the now-public corporation to not take advantage of this market. By doing more to cater to this already engaged audience, Facebook can increase their profits in targeted ad revenue AND help control settings to create a safer social environment. At least that is the solution they’re presenting. Facebook knows that ignoring the problem won’t make it go away. The question seems to be, is this the best way to handle it?

The newly planned structure, which has not been officially confirmed, will allow children under the age of 13 to create and use Facebook accounts, but they must be hosted under a parent account. The parent account will have control of who their child can become friends with, what applications the child can use and what information, if any, is made public. Additionally, parents can see anything their child has posted, sent or received—including private messages. While this may sound like a cautious solution to an admittedly existent problem, it is also freely opening the doors of the world of social media to an audience that may not be ready to handle it. It is estimated that the under 13 user base would increase the number of Facebook users to 900 million, if this program is implemented. However, the question still remains, how effective will it be? Today, among the parents that are aware their preteen has a Facebook account, only 18% have requested their child as a friend. If such a simple step to monitor their children is not being taken, will parents have any interest in these additional monitoring tools and controls?

Though Facebook has yet to acknowledge the details, the supporters and cynics have already taken sides, all of which seem to be focused around safety. Among the supporters, parents and caregivers that feel this will create a safe place within social media where their child(ren) can be connected while still being protected. While those who don’t support the plan claim there is no place in social media for preteens. These parents and caregivers are concerned that even with monitoring, the internet may not be a safe place for kids. Of course, there are other groups just demanding details. In fact, two US Senators, Democrat Markey and Republican Barton, have crafted a quite lengthy (14 paragraphs!) letter to Mark Zuckerberg, founder of Facebook, full of questions about these preteen accounts and their protections.

What do you think about the change in age restrictions? Will these preteen accounts act as an alternative to ignoring the current age restriction and keep kids safe on Facebook? Would you force the preteen in your care to have a “preteen account” or bend the rules and stick with the 13 and over crowd? In our opinion, it all boils down to the issue of online safety that must be discussed with children and constantly monitored by parents, caregivers and internet moguls alike.

How Do You Discipline a Child?

The debate on how to best discipline a child is one marked with longevity and controversy. And lately, it’s been making headlines left and right. 

The most recent trend in disciplining has been the use of humiliation tactics. Parents are exposing children to humiliation by mandating very public admissions of wrong doings; most popularly, forcing their kids to wear signs. This creative form of punishment has been receiving a significant amount of attention from the media.

Recent sign spottings include:

“I was sent to school to get an education. Not to be a bully… I was not raised this way!”

“I like to steal from others and lie about it!!”

“I am a thief. I took money from a family member.”

Humiliation, it turns out, is a highly controversial form of punishment. While the public outcry of support for this type of punishment has been overwhelming, opponents include most childcare experts. Respected author, Alfie Kohn, has suggested this is a disrespectful way to treat any human, regardless of age, and sends children the message that parents are not to be trusted.

But this latest trend is not the only form of child disciplining that people don’t agree on. For example, spanking is always a source of debate.

Last June, spanking received massive media coverage when a Texas woman was arrested for spanking her two year old daughter. She was fined and sentenced to five years probation and mandatory parenting classes. What’s more, her three children were temporarily removed from her custody. Judge Longoria, who presided in the case, explained, “You don’t spank children today, in the old days, maybe we got spanked, but there was a different quarrel. You don’t spank children. You understand?”

This case sparked outrage and, somewhat surprisingly, Judge Longoria’s decision has received little public support. Many cite that spanking, not resulting in injury, is legal in the state of Texas. The few defending the judge’s ruling have suggested that the law is dated and needs to be readdressed.

Such strong support and strong opposition of two very different forms of discipline leads to the assumption that there is no “right answer”. Or at least, the right answer has not been discovered and defined. Certainly, everyone has their idea of the right way to discipline a child so they will feel loved and also grow into a caring, responsible and successful adult. Is it the place of the government or police to define how parents discipline their child?