The
debate on how to best discipline a child is one marked with longevity and
controversy. And lately, it’s been making headlines left and right.
The
most recent trend in disciplining has been the use of humiliation tactics. Parents
are exposing children to humiliation by mandating very public admissions of wrong
doings; most popularly, forcing their kids to wear signs. This creative form of
punishment has been receiving a significant amount of attention from the media.
Recent
sign spottings include:
“I was sent to
school to get an education. Not to be a bully… I was not raised this way!”
“I like to steal
from others and lie about it!!”
“I am a thief. I
took money from a family member.”
Humiliation,
it turns out, is a highly controversial form of punishment. While the public
outcry of support for this type of punishment has been overwhelming, opponents
include most childcare experts. Respected author, Alfie Kohn, has suggested
this is a disrespectful way to treat any human, regardless of age, and sends
children the message that parents are not to be trusted.
But this
latest trend is not the only form of child disciplining that people don’t agree
on. For example, spanking is always a source of debate.
Last June,
spanking received massive media coverage when a Texas woman was arrested for
spanking her two year old daughter. She was fined and sentenced to five years probation
and mandatory parenting classes. What’s more, her three children were
temporarily removed from her custody. Judge Longoria, who presided in the case,
explained, “You don’t spank children today, in the old days, maybe we got
spanked, but there was a different quarrel. You don’t spank children. You
understand?”
This
case sparked outrage and, somewhat surprisingly, Judge Longoria’s decision has
received little public support. Many cite that spanking, not resulting in
injury, is legal in the state of Texas. The few defending the judge’s ruling
have suggested that the law is dated and needs to be readdressed.
Such strong support and
strong opposition of two very different forms of discipline leads to the assumption
that there is no “right answer”. Or at least, the right answer has not been
discovered and defined. Certainly, everyone has their idea of the right way to
discipline a child so they will feel loved and also grow into a caring,
responsible and successful adult. Is it the place of the government or police
to define how parents discipline their child?